On the futility of trying to reason with a boy

Yes, this is another entry condemning boys! I never tire of these; I doubt you do either. This one has to do with boys and relationships, specifically, their reluctance to enter relationships. As I see it, being in a relationship is in their best interests sexually: they get more sex than if they were single, the sex is kinkier, they don't have to work for it, and if they have sexual problems, women will help them work through those problems rather than never speaking to them again. Plus, being in a relationship is just nice; it's nice to be in love and have someone love you, nice to be able to count on someone to help you out when you need it, nice to be able to tell your family, "I found someone," unless your father is Hugh Hefner, in which case I suppose he'd be disappointed. I guess this is why I like older guys: they're willing to be in relationships and they are, on average, less retarded. The problem is that if you fall in love with one of them, you start worrying about them dying before you... and that when you're with them, you look like a hooker. I guess the problem is that boys think that if they commit to a relationship, they won't be able to fuck all the supermodels that will start to approach them. Whatever. Boys are so irrational. Only a retard would trade constant, kinky sex for the remote possibility of convincing someone else to have sex with him. I can't say this really upsets me too much, except in the sense that stupidity is always frustrating, even if it doesn't directly affect me.

Spending time with my relatives in Connecticut wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. My dumb bitch cousin started talking about how she wanted a lap band; I guess she knows that without a nice bod, she's useless. But I also want a lap band, so I really shouldn't be condemning her for that. Then my other dumb cousin described going to college in the South. Apparently, he's been shooting squirrels and eating them. He got himself a BB gun and then decided that the best place to hide it from his mom was... under her sofa. The cousins I actually like didn't show up; they're upset that their parents are getting divorced and they're avoiding their dad. It turned out my uncle's been having an affair for many, many years, and the woman finally decided to leave her husband for my uncle. Damn, Uncle Jon is a homewrecker. But this divorce is actually working out pretty well for me - I got presents from both my aunt and my uncle this year. When in doubt, cash is always a nice gift.